Most real estate investors think about one thing and one thing only:
Their bottom line.
They hit their financial goals, only to realize they’re miserable.
Why is that?
As a society, we’re taught to believe that success is the only path to a good life. But that’s far from the truth. In fact, success often interferes with what we’re actually after: Happiness.
But what if you could have both?
In this episode, Brad Chandler of Express Home Buyers, joins us to discuss how you can reprogram your mind to achieve happiness every step of the way in your business.
Show highlights include:
To connect with Brad Chandler, please visit:
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You're listening to the REI marketing nerds podcast, the leading resource for real estate investors who want to dominate their market online. Dan Barrett is the founder of AdWords nerds, a high tech digital agency focusing exclusively on helping real estate investors like you get more leads and deals online, outsmart your competition and live a freer, more awesome life. And now, your host, Dan Barrett.
(0:41) Right Hello, everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of the REI marketing nerds podcast. As always, this is Daniel Barrett from AdWords nerds.com. If you want to do online marketing in real estate investing, you gotta go to AdWords nerds.com. That is all we do. And it's all we've done for about a decade now. Okay, this week, I am talking to the Brad Chandler. Now you may know Brad as the person behind Express Homebuyers, which is one of this country's most successful real estate investing brands. Brad has been a really influential guy in the real estate investing space for many years now. But I wanted to have him on the show, not just to talk about real estate investing, but to talk about Brad's move into coaching. Now, lots of real estate investors get into coaching. That's not that abnormal, right. But Brad didn't get into coaching just to help people make make money. Brad got into coaching because he found a methodology that changed his wife. And I don't just mean financially, but emotionally and spiritually and mentally. And psychologically, we get into a very deep ranging conversation where we talk about hypnosis, we talk about child development, we talk about the role of trauma and how we approach our lives in our businesses. Now, I'm going to put this out there, a lot of people will listen to the show, you know, their investors, you are probably very focused on the bottom line. But I think we all understand that the ultimate driver behind our business success is how secure and happy and productive we are as people. And a lot of times, we put all our focus on the business part. And we don't really focus on that underlying engine that lets us do what we do. I wanted to have Brad on the show this week, because he is talking to that personal element that underlies every single business decision, success and failure you have ever had, or will ever have. So this is a deep conversation. It's a challenging conversation. It's a conversation that made may make you think a little bit differently about the stuff that you see in your life and your business. And I am so excited to introduce you to Brad Chandler from Brad chandler.com. All right, what's up everybody? This is Daniel Baird, from AdWords nerds. And I am here with the Brad Chandler from Express Homebuyers. And from Brad chandler.com. Brad, welcome to the show, my friend, thank you so much for being Oh, thank you for having me. I'm super excited.
(3:32) Yeah, I am very excited. So it's it's fun to kind of part the hiring or recall part, the curtain gave a little bit of behind the scenes. Usually when I have someone on the show, I do kind of a pre interview, we spend some time getting to know each other a little bit. And I sort of went into that expecting we were going to talk about one thing and then sort of get my head turned around and like really realize that we're probably going to spend some time talking about something else. But before we get there before we get into what you're doing today, and all this kind of interesting stuff we want to touch on, give people kind of a 30,000 foot overview of you and who you are. I think a lot of people will know your company, Express Homebuyers, but good people, if they're unfamiliar, just a sense of who you are and kind of where you fit inside the real estate investing space.
(4:17) Yeah, so I started my real estate journey in ninth grade, when I wrote a book on wrote a book, read a book. I'm not that smart on how to buy real estate with no money down. And I knew at that time, and we'll get into the reasons why later. I knew at that time, I wanted to do real estate because it can make me a lot of money. And so I basically went to school for real estate, got an MBA in real estate work for a real estate developer. And in late 2002, an investor bought my neighbor's house in Vienna, Virginia. I went and talked to him. The house was rundown a couple months later, it's all fixed up. He's got a bunch of people going through there. I'm like what's going on over here he goes, Yeah, to buy houses at 20 30% below market, fix them up and then resell them. I was like, Whoa, maybe I forgot my ninth grade. look that I read, but I know you can do that. So in December of 2002, I decided I was going to start a home buying business and I was going to use TV advertising because that's what my dad did and his law business back in the 80s. Before really attorneys were doing it. So I, I decided I was gonna do that my son was just born in July, and I worked a full time job, I'd come home at nights work, put him to bed, and then from eight to 11, I'd work I'd be up here, pound in like we buy houses, signs. I put door hangers out every day, every week, every month that went by, I wasn't getting a deal. But I was showing up to these RIA meetings at the time real estate investment association meetings, I've seen other people doing it. And I'm like, if I can do it, if they can do it, I can do it. I just became more and more and more persistent. So in July of that year, I got my first house in July and August, I get six houses, came home in October and said to my wife at the time, I just quit my job. And I'm starting Express Homebuyers. She's like, are you crazy? We've got a newborn, I was like, it'll work out. And 19 years later, almost 20 years later, and 4000 houses, it's worked out pretty well for me.
(6:03) Wow, dude. 4000 houses completely blows me away. So I want to touch on a couple different things. But the thing that jumped out to me about that story, was you picking up the real estate book in ninth grade? Right? So were you always entrepreneurial? Like who was that ninth grade kid that even wanted to read a book about real estate? Because I don't think I would have picked up that book. Right? Where are you at that point? Yeah, I think I got that from my dad, because he was an entrepreneur. In seventh grade, I was selling Blow Pops. I went to the local people's used to be people's before CVS, I buy like a bag of Blow Pops, I'd rip out the 15% coupon, I'd buy another bag. And then I think I think they were like five cents or four cents or six cents apiece, when you bought them in bulk. And then I go to school, and I just sold them for 25 or 50 cents. And at one point in time I had like $70 and change. And I thought I was rich and the school should the school shut me down.
(6:56) They're like, Yeah, it's like that was like you want them to encourage it. But also I kind of get like, it's a little probably a little disruptive. But I mean, that strikes me is like such an interesting drive. Like you're used to you mentioned your dad was a lawyer. And so he was doing kind of earlier TV advertising. So did you have a lot of insight into what he was doing? Did he really teach that to you? Or was it something you just kind of absorbed? Because you saw it being modeled all the time? No. I mean, honestly, he didn't teach me a whole lot. He just gave me the spirit of wanting to be my own boss and having that freedom and flexibility. And he gave me his TV guy. When I needed him. I was like, Hey, can he can I talk to your guys as of course you can. That's like when you're now an adult and starting Express Homebuyers. Yeah, to that it was 2003 when you decided to jump into Express. And you've got this newborn, right. I know, in this story, you're like, it's gonna be alright. Did you really think that? And if so, like, why did you think that? Because I realized you had started getting deals at this point, right. But I think most people would look at that decision and say, that is a risky decision, right? You have some data, but you're not a ton of data that it's going to work out. So did you really believe that like, deep down at the time? And if so why do you think you believe that we're able to act on it where I think a lot of people wouldn't necessarily make that jump?
(8:25) So this is a psychology question. And as you know, I love I'm fascinated by psychology. So it's a really interesting question that's never been posed to me. I have got to answer that. So I, when I decided to get into real estate, I had a negative 80,000, our net worth because that's what my graduate program cost me. So when I sit in December, I had a negative ethos our net worth. When I quit my job in October, I think I had $40,000 in the bank from the flips that I had done. So I thought to myself, I've got a runway, I've just done six houses in two months. Hell yeah, I believe in myself. Looking back, why did I do that? I think it was for two reasons why they get into housing. When I was 10 years old, my parents got divorced. And my dad stopped supporting us financially for a time. And my mom was working two jobs. And she said she might have to sell the house and move into public housing. And I'd been to the public housing because as a nurse, she would take me there. And it was like it wasn't the Bronx. But it didn't matter because to me, it was the Bronx. That's all I knew there was a shooting of what happened there one time, so maybe that's why I ended up buying 100 houses looking back on it now. Real estate was a was a way that I saw making a lot of money. And money is what could prove my worth because I didn't feel worthy at the time.
(9:41) Okay, I'm gonna come back. I'm gonna come back to that because let's kind of fast forward because we can stay on Express Homebuyers. I think it's funny because as someone who works with real estate investors a lot I will often refer to Express Homebuyers. If there was like, I'm like, Oh, give me an example of someone who's doing a good job with their online marketing stuff. I will often say like, well Have you looked at the Express Homebuyers site? Right? Like it's it's a company that I think a lot of investors know. And a lot of investors kind of look up through, right. So let's, let's leave it for there. But catch people up on what you are doing now. Because you've recently made this transition into coaching. I want you to give people an overview of what your coaching practice is all about today. And then tell me a little bit about why you decided to move into coaching. You still have Express Homebuyers still kicking butt over there. But why did you decide to add this coaching business as well?
(10:31) Yeah, so it's going to all start with my story. So in December ish of 2020, I went to get help from my son who had anxiety. And I talked with the lady over zoom call. And in the first five minutes, she said, Do you realize you have a tic? And I was like, What are you talking about? She's like, you've got a nervous tic, you gotta you blink profusely. When you talk about your childhood, you probably have some unresolved childhood trauma. If you're gonna help your son, you got to help yourself. And that's for all the parents out there listening. If your kids have behavioral issues, the first place you need to look is yourself. Because unless they have been abused, or or something has happened with another caregiver, you are the cause. And until you can come to grips with that you're, you're the cause it's not your fault. But you're the cause of it. So that's I was like, Oh, sure. She's like, do you want to come out work with my husband, my ex husband, you know, he's her husband at the time. He's an ex navy seal. And so I went through this program, this intensive, and most of it, the real meat of it was a three hour Saturday afternoon, where I'm laying in a bed, like super relaxed, and he's taking me back to my childhood. The scenes in my childhood were like every child, when you go through stressful situations, your brains got to tell you why you're going through it. And it comes up with meanings to get you through it. They're coping mechanisms in mind where something's wrong with me, if I'm being treated this way. Um, if I'm being treated badly, I must be bad. And so I live my whole life like that something's wrong with me. I'm not worthy. And after that three hours, we took those untruths and turn them into the real, the real truths that I started living and within hours, the next day, I was getting a massage. And it was the first time in my life that I've ever cried tears of joy. I was crying. I was like, oh my god, like, for 47 years, with two failed marriages and smoking marijuana and drinking and buying yachts and luxury cars and trying to set the world on fire with Express Homebuyers. I see why I did all that now. It was all to prove my worth and I don't need to prove my worth to anyone so my life Dan, so profoundly shifted. I'm a completely different human being people see me all the time that he looked completely different did you look your our everything's different about you. And it really is. I was given the gift of freedom you don't get freedom from ironically, I started Brad Chandler coaching five years ago as a real estate company. And you can see the tagline behind me Brad Chandler coaching in a freedom. Back then I thought you got freedom from money. You don't get freedom from anything outside yourself. You get freedom from self love and self compassion being your authentic self. And so that's why I started coaching. So now I take people through a proven process. I've studied I've been fortunate to study under some of the world's best, I've become a Certified Hypnotherapist. So it's a five week program. Part of it is a two hour hypnosis session where we dive into your subconscious. Your subconscious is what controls 85% of your behavior. So if you're like well, I've tried therapy for 30 years or 20 years or 10 years I've been to marriage counseling none of that shit works well it doesn't work for the most part because they focus on the conscious mind. So long winded way of saying I've been given this incredible gift and I believe God put me on this planet to return the gift and he's given me the the qualities and the trades to to be pretty good at it. I've coached a number of people now and seen some fantastic results. So that's that's what I'm doing.
(13:48) Let's find motivated seller leads online but don't know where to start. Download our FREE motivated seller keyword report today. AdWords nerds have spent over $5 million this year researching the most profitable keywords for finding motivated seller leads. And you can grab these exact keywords when you download our report at www dot AdWords nerds.com/keywords. So I really feel like you and I came together we came to came together for the podcast at this particular time. I don't know the universe conspired to bring us together because I if you had asked me, let's say even six months ago, I would have said the subconscious the unconscious doesn't really exist in the common conception of it. Like yes, you have like an instinctual drive for water for food or wear it to breathe or whatever. But outside of like your lizard brain stuff, the childhood trauma thing I would just have been like I don't really buy that right. I just I would not I just didn't buy it. And then recently I was this sort of, I read this book, I really enjoyed it. And somebody commented like hey, if you want to understand In this book, you really have to go back and read Freud. And I've never read Freud ever, like I had my conception of what Freud is. So it's like, alright, I'll read Freud for the first time. And Freud, as it turns out for someone who, like had a giant effect on Western Civilization is an incredibly fascinating person, right? And his writing is very insightful. It's very intriguing. So literally, for the first time in my entire life, I'm walking around being like, I don't know, maybe there is an unconscious, maybe there is a subconscious, like, maybe that's the thing. So I feel like this was the perfect conversation for me to geek out on this stuff that nobody ever wants to talk about. So I'm very excited. So let me ask you a question. Let's go back. There's a million things I want to touch on. But let's talk you mentioned becoming a Certified Hypnotherapist. know, when you were discussing your story, or you were talking about laying on the couch, right with a Navy SEAL guy is that what you're doing is sort of a form of hypnotherapy.
(15:52) So so you don't have to lay down. No, I mean, most of my sessions are done over zoom. Right? But that's like, that's where you got started to is like, you're you're basically doing this kind of revisiting your childhood through hypnosis. Absolutely. Yeah. Because the only way you fix pain, whether it's physical or mental, is you got to go to the source of the pain. Why traditional therapy and traditional medicine even like back surgeries and knee surgeries don't always work is because they don't fix the source of the pain, they just try to fix the symptom. So what I do is I go straight to the source of the pain and fix the source so that it's, it's cured forever. So for people who maybe are not familiar with hypnosis, right, or maybe have in their head, the picture of stage hypnosis, which is which is very different from hypnotherapy, right? These are very different things. explain to people like essentially what hypnosis is like when you do you know, your coaching practice that's informed by hypnosis. What does that mean? Exactly? Right? Like, what are you doing with? Um, can you walk and kind of help someone imagine what that experience might be like? Sure. So
(16:55) hypnosis is really just like a meditative state. It's a it's asleep of the nervous system that allows your brain to get into alpha waves, that allows you to take on suggestions, you have likely taken suggestions, your whole life that were bad suggestions. And what we're doing now is we're getting your brain in that state, and we're giving you good suggestions. So when you drive to the office every day, and you don't think I've got to take a left on Main Street, and then a right on Fifth Street, you use Drive and you're talking to someone you're not looking, you're not using your like the blinkers you just know when to do it. That is basically a hypnotic state. So most human beings are in some type of hypnotic state in a given day. So that's it, I'm just taking them into a very relaxed state by doing, you know, simple inductions where we just have them walk downstairs, essentially, and I'm doing some, you know, some deep breathing and stuff like that.
(17:44) And so when you are in that hypnotic state, right, what what are you capable of doing that you couldn't do in your sort of regular waking state? Right, I guess my question is kind of like, what is the advantage to you as the coach or to the person that you're coaching? Is it just that memories are more easily acceptable or accessible? Is it that they're making connections they wouldn't be able to make otherwise? Like, what is the role of that that state in your practice? So really
(18:13) great question, really great question. We are tapping into the subconscious mind. And the subconscious mind has all of your memories. So some people will be like, I don't remember my childhood. And you may not remember it, but you recall it. And you recall it in the ways that you deal with conflict. So when you get in an argument with your wife, it's never about her, are you not doing the dishes, or keeping the toilet seat up? That's not what it's about your mind is going back to the worst point in your life where someone did something that made you feel that way. Your brain is actually doing its job. You're unaware of it, though. Because if you go and check the bush 1000 years ago, and the lion bite your arm off, your subconscious mind doesn't want to doesn't want to know time because it doesn't want to forget 10 years later, so you remember that you go to the worst thing. So what we're doing is we're allowing you to to get into your subconscious mind, which will bring you all the way back to the womb. I know this sounds crazy. Two years ago, if I heard this, I'd be like, This is insane. But I've heard enough people that I trust actually go through it themselves. There, you start to, and I've done the study and the research on it. Do your brain in the last trimester can actually recall things. So some people their memory will go back all the way to the womb, not a ton. But some people that I've had clients where like, I can't think of any memories, I put them into a hypnotic state, the first memory that pops up, I'm two years old, I'm sitting on a bed alone. I feel alone. My parents aren't there. And they're like, I don't know where that came from. Like, it's incredible. Yeah,
(19:37) I think that, you know, that's, you know, something that that Freud famously said, right, nothing in the unconscious is ever destroyed. It's only ever repressed or unremembered, or whatever it is. So I think it's the idea of having kind of almost like a pre verbal memory that maybe you can't call. You can't call up because it's pre verbal and you can't think of how to describe it doesn't necessarily mean it's not there. So You mentioned Allen's there, Dan, but it affects you. So one of my mentors, Gabor Matej, was a Hungarian born child while the Nazis were invading. And his mother literally handed in to some stranger on the street. And for a month, he wasn't with her. He, when she when they got reunited, he wanted nothing to do with her. The mother was like, cuz he felt abandoned, he was abandoned, but he couldn't talk about it. And he just shut down because his brain was smart enough to know that this caused me pain. So I've got to, I got to make sure it doesn't cause me pain again, because our brains are always trying to move us from pain to pleasure.
(20:33) Yeah, let's talk about childhood that you mentioned, this idea that in your development, or in your life as a child, right, you sort of form these associations that kind of inform your behavior as an adult. And I wanted to ask about that process. And maybe we can make it more concrete by bringing it back to your own story. You know, you mentioned that you really associated money with worth, right, we talked about that, you know, that kid, you know, ninth grade, Brad, picking up the real estate thing and being like, well, I want to make a bunch of money. So let's, let's talk about that, like, how do those associations get formed? Right? Like, like, how does that happen? Like, how does the ninth grade Brad come to associate money with worth,
(21:17) because that's what was modeled for me, my parents constantly fight about money. My mom didn't ever want to spend money. And my mom would say, about my dad, he'll earn a nickel and spend a dime. So they had this constant conflict. My dad who was very, very unworthy, he got all of his worthiness through money. So he would always drive the $600,000 Mercedes, he'd always fly first class, whether he should have been doing it or not, he felt so bad about himself that that's what made him feel good. He showed his love threw me by giving me money. He wasn't the guy who hugged me and told me he loved me a lot, didn't show up to a ton of my sporting events. He did, but he wasn't always there. And he wasn't present. It was always always money. So you you essentially as a child, right, is the idea that you are essentially trying to understand the world around you by looking at the important adults in your life and saying like, well, whatever they think is important. That must be what's important is that how that kind of gets cemented in
(22:17) you don't do it consciously, though. So we're born is perfect images of you know, God, right? We're these perfect human beings. And it's not until our imperfect parents and imperfect caregivers push their beliefs on us. But it's really never conscious. It's all unconscious. And that's why it sticks. And that's why if you're 57 years old, or you're 15, you're listening to this, and you've got bad relationship after bad relationship and you're overweight and you eat too much, or you drink too much, or you're constantly judging other people are in a stress state. I'll take you every single time I'll show you how that was formed unconsciously in your childhood, and how it's still controlling your behavior today. But it doesn't have to be that way. Most of the world's suffering is self inflicted. And all you have to do is change your thinking which change your thoughts which change your behaviors which change your actions. It's It's It's It's amazing and that's why I'm so passionate about this because I see the struggling I see the look at the divorce rate 50% 60% The second divorce rate 72% We've got 60% of Americans who are overweight like this is crazy things are getting worse. anti-depression Anytime anxiety medications are going through the roof, but so are hospitalizations. Those drugs don't work. They just flat don't work. What Works is going to the source of the pain, figuring out why this all started and then fixing it fixing it by by living in the truth. Okay guys, hope you enjoyed part one of this episode is just too good to limit to one show. Join us next week to hear the rest
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